ALCOHOL USE
The truth is that many young adults drink alcohol and approximately 5,000 die each year as a result. About 30% of the kids who die are involved in alcohol-related car accidents. Those who have problems with alcohol are more frequently injured in accidents, have more frequent contact with the legal system, more health problems, have more challenges at school, and more conflicts at home. While the decision to use alcohol may be influenced by peer pressure, rebellion, or curiosity, genetics and the age of first-use play a large part in determining which young people are apt to become alcoholics. Certainly the kids of heavy drinkers are most likely to develop problems of their own and risk-taking youth who start drinking early are more likely to develop a life-long relationship with alcohol.
Signs & Symptoms
While the following behaviors may indicate an alcohol or drug problem, some also reflect the normal growing pains of youth. Experts believe that a substance problem is more likely if you notice several of these signs at the same time, they occur suddenly, or some are extreme in nature.
- Mood changes: flare-ups of temper, irritability, and defensiveness
- School problems: poor attendance, low grades, and/or recent disciplinary action
- Physical or mental problems: memory lapses, poor concentration, bloodshot eyes, lack of coordination, or slurred speech
- Dishonest about whereabouts
- Rebelling against family rules
- Change in peer groups
- Reluctant to have you get to know their new friends
- Finding alcohol in your kid’s room or backpack
- Smelling alcohol on his or her breath
Parent Guide
If you suspect your kid struggles with alcohol abuse or binge drinking, it is important to talk to them about what you see.
Let them know specific behaviors you have observed that concern you and ask open ended questions. Avoid making threats or entering into a power struggle with your kid stating facts. Explain the physical, mental, and legal consequences of underage drinking.
Consider teaching moments.
Talk about alcohol when opportunities present themselves. Perhaps during television commercials about alcohol, parties you may attend as a family where drinking occurs, or when stories of a consequence that occurred as a result of alcohol are on the news.
Eat dinner together.
Research has shown that teens from families who eat together infrequently are twice as likely to engage in risky behaviors, such as alcohol abuse (CASA, 2006).
Set a good example.
Parents’ drinking behavior and favorable attitudes about drinking have been positively associated with adolescents initiating and continuing drinking.
Know your family history.
Share family information regarding alcohol use and abuse with your kid.
Educate yourself.
Become knowledgeable about alcohol so that you can share that information with kid and know what you’re dealing with.
Talk to your kids about the dangers of alcohol.
Kids who were warned about alcohol by their parents and kids who reported being closer to their parents were less likely to start drinking.
Be involved in your kid’s life.
Inconsistent discipline, and lack of parental support, monitoring, and communication have been significantly related to frequency of drinking, heavy drinking, and drunkenness among adolescents.
Talk to your kids about your family’s position on alcohol use.
Create an opportunity to explain and discuss why alcohol use is not acceptable in your family.
Get to know your kid’s friends and their parents
Don’t assume that other families share your family’s values. Explore the values of the families that your kid is around often.
Form a network of support.
Elicit the support of other adults so that you are not dealing with this issue alone. A strong support group can help tremendously.
Be available.
Let your kid know that they can always count on you for a ride or to discuss any problems they may have.
BODY IMAGE
Eating disorders are often not just about food. They tend to develop as a way of dealing with life’s challenges, as is often the case with drug and alcohol abuse or gambling. Eating disorders can lead to significant health problems. In addition to the physical effects on the body, the unhealthy behavior often spirals into feelings of guilt, social withdrawal, and increased feelings of inadequacy or low self-esteem.
For many who suffer from eating disorders, controlling food intake and weight allow them to feel “in control” or and empowered. While eating disorders offer some temporary relief form very real emotional conflicts, long-term physical consequences and emotional aftermath (including feelings of guilt and self-loathing) pose significant long-term challenges as the disease progresses.
Signs & Symptoms
For many who suffer from eating disorders, controlling food intake and weight allow them to feel “in control” or powerful over something. While eating disorders offer some temporary relief from very real emotional conflicts, long-term physical consequences and emotional aftermath (including feelings of guilt and self loathing) pose significant long-term challenges as the disease progresses.
ANOREXIA NERVOSA (“ANA”)
- Dramatic weight loss
- Preoccupation with weight, food, calories, fat grams, and dieting
- Distorted body image and perfectionism
Visiting pro-anorexia websites - Extreme calorie and/or fat restriction
Obsession with what can and cannot be eaten – “good” & “bad” food lists - Self-induced vomiting after meals
Family history of eating disorders or abuse - Dishonesty about eating / hiding food
- Difficulty expressing feelings
- Regular fasting and skipping of meals
- Embarrassment/shame/anxiety about eating in public to the point of refusal
- Refusal to eat certain foods, progressing to restrictions against whole categories of food (e.g. no carbohydrates, etc.)
- Frequent comments about feeling “fat” or overweight despite weight loss
- Physical symptoms, including mood swings, depression, limited energy, brittle nails
- Two skipped periods (menstrual cycles) in conjunction with weight loss
- Use of diet pills or laxatives (for weight loss or due to fear of weight gain)
- Excessive exercise/ calorie counting/ portion controlling
- Sudden decision to become a vegetarian
- Withdrawal from family, friends, and/or hobbies
- Denial of hunger
- Anxiety about gaining weight or being “fat”
- Avoiding mealtimes or situations involving food
- Focus on diet books and/or dieting behavior
- Food rituals (eating foods in certain orders, excessive chewing, etc.)
- Going to the bathroom shortly/immediately after meals (anxiety, if not)
- Excessive consumption of nutritionally unbalanced meals
- Fainting, headaches, slowed thinking, poor memory
- A history of falling outside of recommended BMI ranges at annual physical
- Dramatic
BULIMIA NERVOSA (“MIA”)
- Evidence of binge eating, including disappearance of large amounts of food in short periods of time or finding wrappers and containers indicating the consumption of large amounts of food
- Self-induced vomiting after meals
- Family history of eating disorders or abuse
- Dishonesty about eating/hiding food
- Difficulty expressing feelings
- Use of diet pills or laxatives (for weight loss or due to fear of weight gain)
- Going to the bathroom shortly/immediately after meals (anxiety, if not)
- Excessive consumption of nutritionally unbalanced meals
- Fainting, eroding tooth enamel, and headaches, slowed thinking, poor memory
- A history of falling outside of recommended BMI ranges at annual physicals
- Excessive exercise/ calorie counting/portion controlling
- Unusual swelling of the face
- Calluses on the back of the hands and knuckles
- Discoloration or staining of the teeth
- Schedules or rituals to make time for binging and purging
- Withdrawal from family, friends, and/or hobbies
COMPULSIVE EATING
- Difficulty controlling portion size
- Eating when bored, stressed, tired, sad, and angry
- Frequently eating in response to cravings
- Eating alone due to embarrassment
- Feelings of disgust, depression, or guilt
- Periods of eating much more rapidly than usual
- Exhibits low or hyper self-esteem
- Excessive food consumption
- High sugar consumption
- Excessive consumption of nutritionally unbalanced meals
- Large amounts of missing foods
- A history of falling outside of recommended BMI ranges at annual physicals
Parent Guide
Ask your kids about the amplif[i] presentations they saw at school.
What choices did the speaker make that they can or cannot relate to, what did they learn?
Tell your kids what your family’s position is on healthy eating habits.
Talk to your spouse, agree on your family’s position, and share that with your kid. Make that position very clear and always remain consistent, don’t waiver.
Listen more than you talk.
If your kid is willing to talk, listen without judgment, no matter how irrational she or he may sound.
Be a role model for healthy eating, exercise, and body image.
Avoid negative comments about your own or anyone else’s body. Even the most subtle comment about the body can do significant damage.
Expect denial, defensiveness, and anger as you work with your kid.
People with eating disorders are hurting, and this hurt often creates irritability, fear, anger, and defensiveness. It is important to listen without interrupting or judging.
If you believe your kid is suffering from an eating disorder, communicate your concerns.
Share your memories of specific times when you felt concerned about your kid’s eating or exercise behaviors. Explain that you think these things may indicate that there could be a problem that needs professional attention, and that you want your kid to feel supported by someone he/she trusts.
Understand that eating disorders are challenging, but treatment is do-able.
You must stay positive, affirmative, and firm in your conviction that recovery can be achieved. Understand that eating disorders present a complex set of challenges that typically require intervention from a team of professionals. Neither parents nor youth are likely to be able to solve this illness on their own. Please ask for help.
Don’t “insist” that your son or daughter has an eating disorder.
Instead, seek the advice of someone you trust like your family physician or psychologist. Perhaps you may use your kid’s annual physical as a way to explore the extent to which a problem is present. It would be a good idea to alert your doctor ahead of time about your concerns.
Focus more on their health, relationships, and future than on current weight or appearance
Work to avoid power struggles or comments that might foster feelings of guilt or shame. Convey feelings of respect and concern about your kid’s need for professional assistance. Emphasize that you want your kid around and healthy for many years. Our kid must hear we love them just the way they are.
Don’t blame yourself.
Instead, take steps to be the most effective and supportive parent that you can be. Remain calm as you set firm limits insisting that your teen not skip meals or eat alone. Avoid power struggles in which you may be viewed as the “food police.” Be ready to accept the advice of the doctors if they believe that a hospital stay is required to safely address the disease. Be especially firm if your kid pleads with you to leave him/her alone or promises to change on his/her own.
Seek assistance from professionals with specific expertise in treating eating disorders.
Ask your kid to explore concerns with a counselor, doctor, nutritionist, or other health professional who is knowledgeable about eating issues. If you feel comfortable doing so, offer your help to make an appointment or accompany your kid on their first visit. A nutritional counselor will be helpful in designing meal plans that address nutritional deficiencies and facilitate success. The services of a behavioral/mental health professional will be invaluable in managing impulses to eat or avoid eating as well as in addressing emotional difficulties that often underlie eating-disordered behaviors.
BULLYING
Today’s bullying is a combination of classic schoolyard and cyber-bullying. What begins during school appears online that evening for everyone to see. Communicating on social media platforms gives youth 24/7 access to one another. However, with this access comes the potential for them to experience inescapable exposure and victimization, creating an overwhelming sense of helplessness and isolation. Despite this new dynamic, some things never change; the person that has the most control in a bullying dynamic is still the bystander (the third party observer). When a community takes a stand by deciding to become a positive influence with no tolerance for bullying, there is a drastic drop in bullying cases.
Signs & Symptoms
Bullying can begin at a young age, frequently affecting loved ones and peers. It is often thought that youth cruelty is a “normal” part of a growing up and that “everyone goes through it.” The reality is that bullying is characterized by an imbalance of power, unwanted aggressive behavior, or intention to harm, and is carried out repeatedly over time. A target can be victimized by an individual (or group of peers) who intentionally inflicts injury or discomfort upon the victim through physical contact, words, body language, social exclusion, or other means.
The classic schoolyard bully has always been there. But now, bullying is beefed up electronically; anonymous cyber-bullying is also a possibility. Adolescents and even small children communicate through social media and texting; this provides a 24/7 opportunity to do damage to one another. Kids and teenagers who have experienced victimization by this type of inescapable exposure, report an overwhelming sense of helplessness and isolation. One sensitive bystander or group of independent observers can have the most control over the dynamics involved in bullying. When a community takes a stand, deciding to be a positive influence with no tolerance for bullying, there is a drastic drop in bullying cases.
TARGET (VICTIM)
- Comes home hurt and/or with damaged or missing belongings
- Has trouble sleeping or begins sleeping all the time
- Shows a sudden change in eating habits
- Avoids certain places, school, or other activities with peers
- Appears sad, moody, angry, anxious, or depressed when they come home
- Feels helpless and/or talks about suicide
- Experiences a loss of friends or loss of interest in peer groups
BULLY
- Becomes violent with and/or frequently blames others
- Frequently involved in physical or verbal fights with others
- Commonly sent to the Principal’s office or detention
- Suddenly has extra money or new belongings
- Has friends that bully others
- Is overly competitive
- Exhibits low or hyper self-esteem
Parent Guide
Ask your kids about the amplif[i] presentations they saw at school.
What choices did the speaker make that they can or cannot relate to; what did they learn?
Attend one of our adult education presentations.
Discuss with your kid what you have learned about bullying and what your family’s view of bullying is.
Teach your kid to become a healthy bystander.
Suggest that they come to the aid of others. This can be done by removing the target from the situation (tell the target that a teacher needs to see them) or by taking the opportunity to speak positively about the victim, on or offline. If your kid feels safe, they also have the option to tell the bully to stop. Also teach them to document and report everything that they observed. It is important that they understand that telling is not snitching. Tragically, no one intervenes in bullying 85% of the time. Your kid can make a big impact by communicating the problem to school administration.
Make time and listen.
If your kid is being bullied, it is important that they feel as though you are concerned and empathetic about their situation. They do not need to be lectured – they already have enough stress. Utilize this time to reassure them that they are loved and that you will support them through this time in their life. Kids are often reluctant to tell adults about bullying because they feel embarrassed it’s happening to them, or they worry that their parents will be disappointed. Sometimes youth feel like it’s their fault, they’re scared that it will get worse, that no one will believe them or help them do anything about it, or that parents will overreact and take away their technology.
Know the Law.
Most states have taken a strong stand against bullying by instituting laws and statutes designed to protect the well-being of our youth. Take time to research your state laws on bullying. Communicate with your school administration and the police if the problem persists or becomes physical. Make sure to save all communications and include dates, locations, and names of the people you reported the incident to. Several states that have bullying legislation require continued documentation by the school and administration. It is always a good idea for families to also maintain complete records of all incidents and actions taken to resolve the situation.
Do not stand by and hope it gets better.
Get involved in your kid’s life by encouraging positive activities such as sports, music, family outings, and by modeling appropriate conflict resolution. Utilize your school administration as a resource to follow up with every incident.
Communication is key.
Kids that communicate their problems are more likely to recover. Create opportunities for open dialog, encourage them to continually speak with school staff, and reinforce a positive self-image.
Monitor your kid’s behavior on and offline.
It is easy for a kid to switch roles from a victim to a bully and vice versa. Know your kid’s peer groups, monitor their internet use and online posts, check their room and car, and discuss family values and boundaries.
If your kid begins bullying others, calmly let them know that you do not tolerate their behavior.
Most states have taken a strong stand against bullying; discuss the legal ramifications. Make your kid’s behavior your responsibility. If your kid is the bully, work with your school administration and hold your kid accountable to predetermined consequences.
Seek professional help when needed.
Often times there are underlying causes of bullying and a victim can suffer from lasting emotional consequences. Regardless of whether your kid is the bully or the victim, utilize resources like your school, Boys and Girls Clubs, local churches, and health care professionals to bring the issue to resolution. If the problem persists, or becomes violent in nature, contact your local police.
DEPRESSION
Depression is a problem many kids face that can disguise itself as normal “mood swings” due to puberty or teenage development. Therefore, it is often ignored until something more serious happens, like a suicide attempt, self injury, or a serious risk-taking behavior that gets the kid in to trouble. If you think your kid is depressed, do not ignore your observations. There are actions you can make and steps you can take that will help them overcome depression. If it turns out it was normal behavior, you have shown you cared enough to check it out.
Signs & Symptoms
Depression is a problem many kids face that often disguises itself as normal “mood swings” due to puberty or teenage development. Therefore, it is often ignored until something more serious happens, like a suicide attempt, self-injury, or a serious risk-taking behavior that gets the kid in trouble. If you think your kid is depressed, do not ignore your observations. There are things you can do and steps you can take that will help them overcome depression. If it turns out it was normal behavior, you have shown you cared enough to check it out.
DEPRESSION:
- Persistent sad, anxious or “empty” feelings
- Feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism
- Feelings of guilt, worthlessness and/or helplessness
- Irritability, restlessness
- Loss of interest in once pleasurable activities or hobbies
- Fatigue and decreased energy
- Insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping
- Overeating, or appetite loss
- Thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts
- Persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment
- Withdrawal from family and friends
SUICIDE:
- Family history of depression or suicide
- Unresolved losses (deaths, moves, job loss, etc.)
- Family conflicts
- Teen pregnancy
- Medical problems (sleeping, eating, pain)
- Academic failure / Learning problems
- Mentioning suicide or a direct warning about suicide
- Plan to commit suicide / past attempts
- Stressful events / community trauma
- Rigid thinking / impulsiveness
Parent Guide
Ask your kids about the amplif[i] presentations they saw at school.
What choices did the speaker make that they can or cannot relate to, what did they learn?
Tell your kids what your family’s position is on depression and self injury.
Talk to your spouse, agree on your family’s position, and share that with your kid. Make that position very clear and always remain consistent, don’t waiver.
It can be difficult to tell depression from normal teen moodiness.
It is recommended that when signs of depression occur suddenly or in combination with each other, it may need to be evaluated more seriously by a professional.
Show your kid that you care.
If you suspect your kid may be struggling with depression symptoms, let them know you are concerned in an honest, caring way.
Communicate your concerns without judgment.
There is no single known cause of depression. Some types of depression tend to run in families, suggesting a genetic link. However, depression can occur in people without family histories of depression as well.
Ask your kid to explore their symptoms and feelings with a counselor or physician who deals with depression.
Depressive illnesses are disorders of the brain. The parts of the brain responsible for regulating mood, thinking, sleep, appetite and behavior appear to function abnormally, and your kid may need medication to assist.
Explore the reasons your kid may feel the way they do.
Trauma, loss of a loved one, a difficult relationship, or any stressful situation may trigger a depressive episode. Subsequent depressive episodes may occur with or without an obvious trigger.
If your kid is not ready to listen, don’t give up.
Let your kid know you are there to provide support and listen when they are ready. Don’t pressure them to talk, but ensure that they know they can always go to you to discuss how they may be feeling.
Educate yourself on signs, symptoms, and causes of depression.
Talk to your doctor about your kid’s behavior; make an appointment for your kid to see their doctor as well. There could be a physical reason for them to be showing some of the symptoms of depression. Check your family medical history. Look for patterns of depression and share what you find with your kid.
Talk with your kid about your concerns.
Ask your kid about their thoughts and feelings regarding their behavior and note how it compares to signs of depression. Let them know that you are concerned and are there to help.
Consult with a specialist in adolescent psychology.
List the warning signs and behaviors that you have noticed and ask for a recommendation or a consultation meeting with your kid.
Respect your kid’s privacy.
Make it a point to be diligent in helping them locate the professional resources they need for assistance. Be sure to protect their confidentiality while seeking professional help.
Remember the issues that increase the likelihood of suicidal behavior.
Such as family history of mood disorders, substance abuse, history of child abuse (physical, sexual, or emotional), family history of suicide attempts or completions, history of previous suicide attempts, a diagnosis of ADHD, current relationship problems (especially family or significant other), having access to weapons or prescription medicine.
DRUG USE
The simple answer is that drugs alter perceptions of reality in ways that often feel pleasant. Drug use may temporarily satisfy emotional or social needs for experimenting young people. Many youth view drugs like a Swiss Army Knife, a tool with many functions: relaxation, pleasure, socialization, avoidance of emotional pain, a way to forget about problems, satisfy curiosity, avoid alienation, find excitement, feel like part of the crowd, go to sleep, wake up, cope with failure, relieve boredom, and /or to simply infuriate their parents. Some people are genetically programmed for difficulties with addictions while others find that curiosity leads to drug dependence and the challenges of dealing with addiction become overwhelming.
Signs & Symptoms
- Unexplained drop in grades
- Isolates from family
- Frequent and sudden change in moods
- Dishonest about whereabouts
- Dishonest about a lot of things
- Early cigarette smoking
- Change in peer groups
- Often draws pot leaves, drugs, or drug symbols
- Parental defiance
- Red, watery, or glassy eyes
- Uses eye drops to hide red eyes
- Late or unexplained hours
- Rejection of parental values
- Have found unexplained paraphernalia
- Disappearance of money or possessions
- Defensive about drug use
- Antisocial behavior
- Loss of interest in previous hobbies and activities
Parent Guide
Ask your kids about the amplif[i] presentations they saw at school.
What choices did the speaker make that they can or cannot relate to? What did they learn?
Tell your kids what your family’s position is on alcohol or drugs.
Talk to your spouse, agree on your family’s position, and share that with your kid. Make that position very clear and always remain consistent. Don’t waiver.
Attend one of our adult education presentations.
Discuss with your kid what you have learned about home drug testing kits and the ability to use them at any time. When talking about the issue of trust, make it clear to your kid that you do trust them, and that you are continuing to build trust with them. You trust your kids to succeed at school, yet you wouldn’t follow up by not looking at their report card. Home drug testing kits provide your kids an “out” from negative peer pressure situations; a way to say “no” when their friends are saying “yes.”
Lock up or dispose of your unused or expired prescription medications.
While prescription medications serve a valuable function when used correctly under the supervision of a doctor, they can be harmful and even deadly when abused or used incorrectly. Don’t allow your prescription medications to fall into the hands of your kids or their friends. If you need to keep your prescription medications for a prolonged period of time, purchase a prescription lockbox or other safe to keep your kids from accessing the drugs. If you no longer need the medications, find a prescription drug disposal location near you that will allow you to safely dispose of them. (Arizona Prescription Take Back)
Be clear with your kids that drug use is not acceptable in your family.
Look for opportunities to discuss the physical dangers to your kid’s health that result from drug use. You may also want to discuss the risks and possible catastrophic consequences from poor decisions made while using drugs. Consider setting rules and defined consequences for breaking each rule. Some families write a contract to be sure both the parents and kid clearly understand the expectations and consequences. Consistency with respect to enforcing rules and consequences is cited as a key factor in shaping behavior. Rewards for honoring rules are a great way to reinforce good decision-making. Acknowledging rule following with positive words goes a long way with kids.
Listen to your kid.
If possible, ask your kid an open-ended question to create a two-way conversation about drugs. For example, you may begin with “I received this drug test kit at school tonight, what do you think?” Remember that your tone and the length of your response will impact the discussion. A kid may perceive a long response as a speech not a dialogue. Showing your willingness to listen will make your kid feel more comfortable about opening up to you.
Ask your kid what he or she knows.
Ask a question like, “What have you heard about drugs that is good?” in a non-judgmental, open way. Let your kid answer the question in its entirety. Thank them for the information then take the opportunity to start two-way discussion providing them with correct information. Be sure to have educated yourself prior to this conversation so you can answer all of your kid’s questions. If you don’t know an answer to a question, don’t guess, as you will lose credibility with your kid. Offer to find out or look for the answer together.
Use daily events, such as television shows and news reports, as a conversation starter.
Sharing a local incident with your kid, such as an automobile accident resulting from someone under the influence, may open a discussion and create a way for you to provide your kid with information. You may want to raise an open-ended question about an individual you see on TV who is taking drugs, such as “How would they feel if they were in an accident because they were using drugs? How would their life change?”
Give your kid words to use with their friends if asked to use drugs.
You may consider giving your kid words to have in their mind to use if situations arise where drugs are offered. It will be easier for your kid to respond if they have a few planned phrases and a strategy for leaving the situation. One possible response is “I can’t, my parents will drug test me when I get home, and if I test positive my parents said they will call your parents.”
INTERNET SAFETY
Youth are tech savvy and get most of their information and socialization through the Internet and digital devices. For them, there is no distinction between the real world and the online world – they are one in the same.
As a parent, the best way to help ensure your kid’s safety online is to become tech-savvy yourself. Think of technology as a language. Your kid has most likely spoken this language since birth and is fluent in it. You need to know the language if you want to communicate with them.
Signs & Symptoms
For anyone born after 1980, the world has always had computers and cell phones. They are tech savvy and get most of their information and socialization through the Internet. For them, there is no distinction between the real world and the online world – they are one in the same.
As a parent, the best way to help ensure your child’s safety online is to become tech savvy yourself. Think of technology as a language. Your child has spoken this language since birth and is fluent in it. You need to know the language if you want to communicate with them. Yes, technology can seem overwhelming, but this handout will help you get started by explaining the basics of technology and online safety. You’ll learn some important values to teach your child about using technology. Finally, you will find some useful online resources where you can continue your education.
- Secretive about online activities
- Obsessive about internet use
- Gets angry when he/she can’t get online
- Receives/makes phone calls from/to unknown people
- Receives gifts and/or packages from unknown persons
- Withdraws from family and friends
- Risky/unhealthy relationships
- Cyber Bullying: See bullying section
- Downloading internet pornography
- Depression
- Self-injury
- Eating disorders
- Substance abuse
- Changes screens or turns off computer when an adult enters a room
Parent Guide
Ask your kids about the amplif[i] presentations they saw at school.
What choices did the speaker make that they can or cannot relate to, what did they learn?
Tell your kids what your family’s position is on internet safety.
Talk to your spouse, agree on your family’s position, and share that with your kid. Make that position very clear and always remain consistent, don’t waiver.
Attend one of our adult education presentations.
Discuss with your kid what you have learned about internet safety.
Create and follow consistent rules for internet use.
Include sites that they can and cannot visit and which social media sites and apps are acceptable. Set privacy settings on social media sites appropriately and monitor who they are linked with in the digital world. Regulate how much time they can spend online, discuss where they can access the internet, and remember to set log off times.
Model appropriate online behavior for your kid.
As parents we have the ability to model life skills like conflict resolution, maintaining positive and safe online relationships, and how to take intentional breaks from technology.
Create opportunities for two-way conversation about the internet.
This is a great opportunity to role-play correct responses to online threats and to simply listen to what your kid faces online.
Educate yourself.
Technology is constantly changing In order to be a reliable resource for your kid, be able to identify current online trends and dangers as well as warning signs for identity theft, cyber-bullying, sexual solicitation, and sexting.
Deter negative behavior online.
Take planned action to lock your kid’s credit report, use browsing settings to block dangerous websites, “friend” your kid on their social media sites (be aware that youth usually have multiple social media accounts), and use computer monitoring software to help deter behavior.
Opioids & Fentanyl
Every day, Arizona youth are buying and taking counterfeit pills laced with Fentanyl and they’re overdosing at an alarming rate.
The 2021 Monitoring the Future study reported the percentage of adolescents reporting drug use decreased significantly in 2021. At the same time, teenage drug-related deaths increased exponentially for the first time in record history. In the first year of COVID in 2020, teen death from overdoses doubled compared to the last decade. It increased by another 20% in 2021. If drug use by teens has decreased, why are we losing more teenagers? The reason is drug use is less common, but more dangerous. Counterfeit pills containing fentanyl are widespread throughout the country, and teens may not be aware that their lives are at stake.
It is important for us to educate and provide resources to young people about the dangers and risks associated with opioids and fentanyl, and the importance of prioritizing mental health. We strongly believe that a community effort is necessary to change the devastating impact of the opioid crisis on our families, communities and some of our most vulnerable victims, our youth.
Parent and Adults Education Packets
Webinars
Available Services
RELATIONSHIPS
Safe dating can be described as the practice of healthy, interdependent relationships between individuals. Many relationships, however, are unhealthy and can lead to real emotional and physical consequences for those individuals in the relationship and others around them. How do we differentiate between what is “safe” and “unhealthy” when it comes to dating? Unhealthy relationships are defined as relationships in which physical, sexual, psychological, or emotional violence take place. Many unhealthy relationships can be avoided by helping youth to develop skills to create healthy relationships and by teaching them to recognize the signs of unhealthy relationships. If we witness signs of an unhealthy relationship – what can we do?
Signs & Symptoms
Safe dating can be described as the practice of healthy, interdependent relationships between individuals. Many relationships, however, are not safe and can lead to real emotional and physical consequences for those individuals in the relationship and those around them. But how do we differentiate between what is “safe” and “unsafe” when it comes to dating? And if we see signs of unsafe dating, what can we do?
- Drop in academic performance
- Bite marks, bruises, scratches, or burn marks
- Truancy
- Quick and intense involvement in a relationship
- Changes in mood; either depression or anxiety
- Acting secretive or acting out
- Sexually uninhibited or hyper-sexual behavior
- Apologizing or justifying partner’s behavior, especially his/her temper
- Rejection or isolation from friends or family
- Not attending school activities
- Discontinuing involvement with extra-curricular activities
- Striving for perfection
- Preoccupation with appearance
- Looking uncomfortable or fearful around partner
- Deferring to partner in mixed company
- Wanting to control someone else’s decisions
- Eating disorders or sudden weight loss
- Personal possessions damaged, missing, or destroyed
- A pattern of violent relationships
- School suspension for fighting
- Involvement with the police
- Alcohol or drug use
- Diary entries or social media posts revealing reckless behavior
- Individuals who are controlling of their partners are more likely to be physically aggressive
Parent Guide
Ask your kids about the amplif[i] presentations they saw at school.
What choices did the speaker make that they can or cannot relate to, what did they learn?
Teach your kid boundaries.
Educate your kid on how to be assertive and to communicate their desires and limits clearly and early on in a relationship.
Remind your kid to consider others.
Educate your son or daughter to never assume that any manner of dress or non-verbal behavior means a person feels the same way you do.
Check for respect.
Teach your kid to pay attention if their date gets too close, touches them in a way they don’t like, or ignores their feelings and limits. Your kid should never feel their desires are disregarded in a relationship. All parties should respect the others wishes, and “No” always means “No.”
Give insight on impairment.
Frequently remind your kid to avoid using alcohol or other drugs that may dull their judgments so that they can maintain awareness about their situation at all times.
Teach your kid to trust their instincts.
If your son or daughter is in a situation in which they feel pressured, uncomfortable, or unsafe – it probably is. Help them learn how to identify how they feel and go with their gut feelings.
Assist your kid with skill development.
Help your kid develop skills that will aid them in paying attention to what is happening around them. It will help reduce their chances of becoming isolated or being put in a vulnerable situation. Tell your kid to never accept drinks (even water!) from strangers or leave their drink unattended.
Teach your kid self-reliance.
Have your kid provide their own transportation when going out (don’t rely on the person your kid will be meeting) and help them to develop independence.
Know where your kid is.
Make sure you know where your kid is and when he/she will be back. Have them keep their cell phone on at all times so that there are open channels of communication available that allow for you to easily get in contact with them if need be.
Know who your kid is with.
Get as much information about the person they are meeting as possible (phone number that is verified, name, etc.). Ensure that your kid is not going out with a person who they do not know, or who may be a stranger.
Consider group dating.
Also, set rules around meeting in public places or requiring the date to come to your house to meet the parents until your family has gotten to know them well enough.
Urge your kid to stay away from private or secluded places.
Have them agree to never leave an event with someone they just met. Remind them to make sure they always leave with friends and never leave friends behind.
Engage your kid in a dialogue.
If you have concerns about their partner, talk about it. Forbidding your kid to date someone is likely to shut down communication, which may exacerbate an unhealthy situation in the future.
Establish a “no consequence” procedure.
If your kid calls you while under the influence, don’t talk consequences. You can always address the concerns about substance use in relationships once they are safe.
Recommend a professional.
Offer your kid the opportunity to speak to a professional about the challenges in their relationship. Kids are sometimes more able to tolerate input from an objective third party than from a parent or friend.
If your kid is concerned about leaving a relationship that he or she believes is unsafe, help them develop a plan ahead of time.
The plan should take into consideration: the situation in which they will end the relationship, a person they will have with them when they break up with their partner, a code word to share with a trusted person that will alert them of their need for help and a plan for the type of help they require, the language they will use to end the relationship, and what form of communication they will use to end the relationship (phone, email, text).
Give advice for post break-up situations.
Advise your kid to also think about what help they will solicit from school support personnel subsequent to the break-up to ensure their safety away from home, how to block contact with their partner after the break-up, how they will ensure they are not alone following the break-up as they return to situations where they might be in contact with their former partner, and in some instances, when the police should be contacted to execute an order of protection.